How I Came to Realize My White Privilege
Altadena, CA during the Bobcat Fire in Angeles National Forest. September 2020
I started writing this blog during the first stay-at-home orders for COVID-19. Statistics were showing the virus was adversely affecting non-white populations at a higher rate than other populations.
I revisited it on June 3, nine days after the killing of George Floyd by police in Minneapolis. There seemed to be an awakening about racism in our society, which was beautiful to witness. At the time, I was challenged by some conversations I had who dismissed important reasons behind the protests.
At the end of September, I came back to this blog when protests about race continued in cities across the country. They played into a political divide, which, to me, is a perfect example of just how much race IS woven into the politics of the country. It was only in the decade before I was born that the Civil Rights movement occurred. Racism still is systemically woven into our society. But, if it doesn’t affect you or your family, it can be hard to see.
As a yoga teacher, I’m interested in perception. The Bobcat fire, pictured above, was a couple miles from our house. The picture does not capture how oppressive it was to live with a brown sky, polluted air, and raining ash. After four days, we went to bed with moods as dim and heavy as the sky.
During the night, the winds shifted and we woke to a clear day. In a snap, everything felt “normal” again. We went outside. There was laughter. Our dispositions quickly improved and life returned to normal. (Pandemic “normal”.)
The TRUTH was the fire was exactly the same. It raged behind the mountains, just as before, the same distance away. Only because of the wind did our perception of the fire change.
To me, understanding privilege is like that. It’s perception. The fires are there, you just don’t perceive them because the wind isn’t blowing your way.
Privilege does not mean absence of financial struggle, hunger, trauma. It means you have not suffered those things because of the color of your skin. It does not mean that successes are unearned. It simply means having greater access to opportunities.
White privilege is walking into a store and the displayed products are tailored to you. I never considered that throughout my life until it was pointed out to me, then I couldn’t unsee it. It means easy access to books, toys and stories that represent your looks and reality. As recently occurred, if you are the only Black person in a fancy hotel and a cell phone is lost, nobody will wonder if you stole it. If you are a white mom with teenage white son, you probably do not have any worries about your child being profiled by the police when he goes out with his friends. If he does something questionable, you don’t have to fear for his wellbeing.
As a grown (white) woman living for many years in LA, currently in a very racially and socioeconomically mixed area, my life experiences and perceptions widened.
I had points of confusion as I explored my unconscious biases, and the benefits and privileges gained due to race. There were times my buttons were pushed when I listened to different voices. I said things like: “Not all white people! I’m not like that.” It takes awhile to learn how to actively listen—especially when messages are delivered with strong feelings. But people have the rights to their feelings—I can separate myself from generalized statements. I’m also willing to look at myself and see if and where I fit into them.
As a yogi, our practice is more than asana, the physical postures. Satya (truth) and svadyaya (self-study) are essential elements of the practice.
What are your thoughts on privilege? If you’ve been educating yourself, what resources have been valuable to you. If you disagree, why? Comment below! (respectful messages only)
There’s a giant wildfire raging three miles away on the other side of the mountain… Perception.
